So what's worse than changing a tire in 107 degree heat in the middle of nowhere Kansas? Changing a tire in 109 degree heat on the side of the highway in Arkansas! But more on that later.
We made decent time in the morning, our breakdown procedures continue to improve and we were able to park the trailer at a Target and head to the Pea Ridge Battlefield by 1000.
*** HISTORY LESSON ALERT*** The following paragraphs contains historical facts concerning The War of Northern Aggression (we are in the South now ya'll) and various Arkansas state locales. Reading this information will not harm you in any way and all content is Rated G (that's only for the historical stuff, not anything else I write).
So I spent all this time telling "Lonnie" about Pea Ridge ahead of time, how it was in 1864 and it was a pivotal western battle and Grant was the hero...blah blah blah. So we get to the visitors center and it's already 90-something degrees. We go to the counter and I ask the Ranger, trying to sound all smart, if there will be a big event for the 150th Anniversary of Pea Ridge. He said "It was this past March, we about 10000 reenacters." I was really confused and I asked,
Me:"Pea Ridge was in 1862? I thought it was in '64."
Ranger: "Nope, '62",
Me: "So, Grant wouldn't have been involved? No, of course not...",
Smug Ranger: "No, the leading general was McCollough."
I'm thinking I'm some kind of moron and the Ranger must agree, but at this point I'm feeling so weird being so off with Civil War facts (after all, it's my graduate frickin degree) that all I can say is, "I must be thinking of another western battle." The Ranger looks unsympathetic and not a bit convinced that I know anything about history, so he just nods. Wow. Shaking my head, we gather the wild, ferral children and head outside for a battlefield tromp. It is never too early to start hiking battlefields with your children and by the excitment that mine exhibited, there is hope for their historical futures. That's because they are amused by finding sticks. When they are teenagers, I expect history-based vacations may invoke insomnia and whining. Pea Ridge was a major battle for Missouri's place in the CW, and although a technical Union victory, really it was more of a draw, and the result was Missouri stayed neutral throughout the war. Because it was hot, the tromp wasn't long, but well received. Back in the Sally's lovely AC, we returned to our parked trailer.
Trailer hooked (despite some douchbag parking almost right in front of it...in an empty parking lot!), we were on our way. Making great time, I started thinking that today was going to be great. I start looking up historical landmarks along our course, and I see that the Battle of Shiloh is along our route. Suddenly, a wave of memory comes over me and I realize that I was mistaking Pea Ridge for Shiloh! Of course!! Everyone knows that Grant was at Shiloh! It was pivotal, but still in 1862, not '64. But who really can keep track of all those dates anyway.
Of course, I had a similar contented feeling yesterday prior to the tire going flat. We were on Highway 40, well-behaved truck children are sleeping blissfully, when suddenly an explosion on our passenger side had us both alert and searching for the IED. I see in my mirror the rubber hanging out from the tire region and "Lonnie" and I agree that we blew a tire. Frick. We quickly pull over and I get out to see the shreds that are left and some damage to the rear wheel well. Double frick. However, like a professional pit crew, we had that tire changed in no time. I spent most of the effort trying in vain to find a new tire only to discover that the only thing more annoying about Kansas closing at noon on Saturday is that Arkansas is completely closed on Sunday. Is there no work ethic in the US anymore? Sigh. Walmart's were open, but didn't have our tire. We made it to the town of Conway and "Lonnie" did pressure and heat checks on all the tires while I took the still-behaved children, now awake, to a Burger King play area. Because there were no options for new tires, we decided to play "Pray the Tire Holds" again, and press on to Memphis. I'm happy to say the spare is holding.
As we were leaving Conway and enjoying our Starbucks, we drove past a sign that said Toad Suck Park, and all the Starbucks came out my nose. Not the best way to enjoy a beverage, but we seriously thought the sign was a joke. Enter Google, who informed us that the town (it's a town?!) of Toad Suck is named after river men along the Arkansas River who would frequent the taverns and "Suck their bottles back so hard they blew up like toads", ergo the town name. Double wow. We were also fortunate to pass a huge traffic jam and witnessed a motorhome towing a pickup hauling a golf cart. It was the Turduckin of the RV world!!! So cool.
We get to our awesome Memphis RV place much much later than planned, but we just catch the spectacular sunset and evening views right on the Mississippi River. Set up is going great and the kids are behaving (meaning they haven't discoved the river yet), when "Lonnie" calls for my help. He got sprayed with the sewer hose and needed help. Ick and hahahahaha! I come over and undo the clean water hose and I'm watching for the kids when "Lonnie" says, "I'm turning the water on". It's not until he is soaking wet that I realize I had the hose aimed right at him!! I bend over laughing at His Royal Wetness, when he grabs the hose from me and gives me a good spray as I run away in hysterics. Hee hee. I start to witness the transformation of my kids to the wild-ferral children (maybe it's a moon thing) and as I'm grabbing Orion from the neighbors front door, I hear Ayla screaming bloody murder and running/hopping on one foot and grabbing at it. Oh crap, what happened. I put one screaming child down, pick up Ayla and run inside to discover that she is crawling with fire ants!!! She's hysterical and I'm unnerved as I try to dislodge the violent attackers and reign a massacre on them for biting my baby. Little buggers are impossible to kill! I finally defeat their offensive and examine Ayla's legs. There are over 20 bites on her. Thankfully, a little Benadryl and a bath cures everything, and we were able to enjoy Olympics and Chinese food (no crockpot today). And watch the river barges floating along to Dire Straits 'Calling Elvis'.
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